TV Guide, Shmeevee Guide

Is it just me or is anyone else sick and tired of the declining usefulness of television listings?

In the past a TV magazine like TV Guide or even those free recycled things you’d find in the rack at the door of the grocery store were accurate 99% of the time. Unless some sort of unscheduled event like breaking news of war or something occurred, you could generally rely on them.

These days the TV Guide magazine is pretty useless since networks make last minute changes a lot more often than they used to. Because of the nature of the printed magazine they cannot keep up with all the changes. That is excusable but the TV Guide channel which should always be quickly updatable, while a little better, is still not accurate all the time. If that weren’t bad enough, Internet TV listings and EPGs should be able to be accurate 100% of the time no matter what and yet they are not!

This is ridiculous.

I Just Can’t Just (a.k.a. “I Can’t Just Can’t)

I just can’t believe how many people have difficulty with the word JUST. It is one of the most misused words there is. It is used incorrectly most often when used in combination with another word. Can’t is the most common one. This topic never came up in any of the linguistics courses I’ve taken so I figured I would take it upon myself to educate the masses. I have not done a full linguistic analysis to technically demonstrate the differences but trust me, they are different. For now I will try to highlight the differences by giving examples. One note, the ones I can remember right now seem to be negatives which may mean something or not. I’ll have to try to remember some others to check.

Can’t.

The phrase “can’t just” is very different from the phrase “just can’t”. Respectively, one is exclamatory, the other is explanatory. Saying “I can’t just walk in there.” means that you are capable of walking in there but it is not easy or appropriate for some reason. For example, you may need identification or you may not be dressed appropriately. It gives an feeling of resistance. Saying “I just can’t walk in there.” means that you are unable to walk in there even if it were possible. For example you may have a broken leg or the doors may be locked. It gives a feeling of helplessness.

Don’t.

The phrase “don’t just” is also different from the phrase “just don’t”. The former is a statement minimal requirements while the latter is a statement of fact. For example saying “You don’t just go out and buy a house.” means that you cannot just go out and buy a house because there is more to it than that, and that buying a house requires more work, planning, research, etc. beforehand. Saying “You just don’t buy a house.” is an unquestionable factual declaration indicating that you cannot or may not buy a house.

There’s several other combinations (like can’t and don’t) where just is usually used incorrectly but I cannot remember them right now. I’ll add them to this post as I do.

rEsUMéeeE

I’m only going to say this once. It’s “resumé”. Not résume, not résumé, not resume. I am sick and tired of people spelling it incorrectly. It’s gotten so bad that even dictionaries are listing multiple or even all variations because they are now accepted as de facto spellings. It’s ridiculous.

Resumé is from the French word résumer which means to summarize. Anyone who knows French knows that the accent on the e is a l’accent aigu. It makes the e below it sound like a long a as in dAy. While the French term puts the accent on the first e, it is not pronounced as -ay; instead that sound is achieved at the end with the -er. In English, we don’t pronounce -er as -ay, and so drop the r. If you are going to Anglicize the word, then it only makes sense to put the accent on the last e. Without any accents at all, resume is pronounced reesum, you know, as in “the break is over; resume your work”. Now, with this knowledge try this exercise: say the various variations of resumé, pronouncing correctly. You’ll find that the only one that sounds right is resumé. Raysumay is wrong, raysume is wrong, and reesume is wrong.

You may get away with saying rèsumé if you really want to give it that French accent, but unless you are French, then just write resumé.